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Ladies Don't

by Linda Jenkinson

<img src="images/lady.jpg" alt="Lady" width=291 height=412">
What don't ladies do? This poem explains it.

Ladies don’t fart. They retire. With the vapors. And stay out of sight. Until they smell sweet.

Ladies don’t burp. They belch. Behind a hand. And subtract from their diets. What they like to eat.

Ladies don’t spit. They wipe. Then tuck the output. Into a tissue.
Very discreet.

Ladies don’t sweat. They perspire. But there’s a Secret.
That helps them stay neat.

Ladies don’t snore. Of that I am sure. But I’m a woman, no lady.
And my snores are roars!